Pumpkin Pie

Making a pumpkin pie is something I have always wanted to do but, for some reason, never got around to doing.  Like a lot of things… So I finally got myself cranked and just did it and am I glad I did.  Now I know what a pumpkin pie is really like when it doesn’t come out of a can.  It is a multiphase project but each of the steps is simple when taken one at a time.  This is how I did it. 

First, steal a pumpkin (or two if they are small).  If you live someplace where people don’t decorate their houses with pumpkins for Halloween or Thanksgiving you might have to steal it from a grocery store and that could lead to jail time so I’d suggest you 1) take a trip out to the country and find one of those houses or 2) pay for it.  In my case I found three small pumpkins dumped in the woods across the street from one of my neighbor’s houses.  They were nestled in a bed of dry leaves just blown off the guys lawn so were protected from the recent frost and free of bruises or damage of any sort.  There are many fine pumpkins still sitting on porches all over the neighborhood and now that I know how good the pies turn out I might just go “stock up”.

Secondly, cut the pumpkins into big chunks and scrape out the seeds and stringy muck with a big ol’ spoon.  The seeds can be saved for toasting-yum!  Use the big ol’ spoon to gently push out and separate the seeds from the muck-- kinda like tiddly winks when they fly all over the kitchen.  Throw out the muck that looks like the red head’s hair on Desperate Housewives.   I put the seeds, unwashed, in an aluminum pie pan, and sprinkle a drop or three of olive oil and some Morton’s kosher salt.  Pop ‘em in the toaster oven and stir them every 3 or 4 minutes while they dry out and toast.  Keep a close eye on them and when the first one burns they are done!  Start eating them right away or you will have to fight for some when everyone else finds out you made them.

Thirdly, take the chunked pumpkin and put it in a caulender in a pot with some water and steam the chunks for about 25 or 30 minutes.  You’ll know they are done when a fork goes in really easy.  Let them cool while you drink coffee and eat the seeds and when coolish scrape the soft flesh out with the big ol’ spoon.  Mash up the flesh with a big ol’ spoon or a potato masher and 1) put in a container and save in the refrigerator (last a week plus or minus) 2)put in a container and save in the freezer for the middle of the winter when you are wasting away and starving for something good, 3) start making pies right away, which is what I did.

Beat 3 eggs, add ½ cup of whole milk or cream (if you are not scared of dying from thick blood or obesity), ½ teaspoon each of cinnamon, ginger, salt (unless you are scared of dying from apoplexy in which case stop eating the seeds!).  I used fresh ginger which I shredded up with a zester and I threw in a little lemon zest as well.  Glad I did.  It doesn’t come through very strong in the final product but it really does spark up the recipe!  Mix the mess all together with the mashed pumpkin and pour it into a pie shell.  I cheated and used store-bought frozen shells ‘cause I suck at pastery.   Bake at 375 until the crust looks like it’s gonna burn if you don’t get it out of there.  (similar to the timing of the seeds.  Do you note a pattern in my technique?)  Let cool.  Start eating right away before the household finds out you made it and you have to fight for a piece!  (Note a pattern in my eating habits?)  Enjoy. 

You might want to share some with the neighbor--the one you stole the pumpkin from.  Maybe next year he will be bringing you some pie!