Bottle Nosed Ballerina Fish

Hobe Sound-No Muffler Necessary part 2

Breaking News/ February 16, 2016

Dateline: Hobe Sound, Florida

Woman Lands Rare Fish

Earlier today in the small South Florida town of Hobe Sound a woman fishing for the first time in her life hooked one of the strangest-if not the rarest-fish ever brought out of these waters. Dubbed the “Bottle-nosed Ballerina Fish” it is all anyone around here is talking about.

Ms. Elisabeth Gartman, a recent transplant from cold New York, took her dog for a walk down to the Jim Graham boat ramp. This popular boat ramp on the banks of the inter-coastal waterway was quiet today, the only other people on the dock were Mr. and Mrs. Rudolf Valenti, also escapees from the bitter winter in Brooklyn, NY.  Mr. and Mrs. Valenti were fishing off of the boat dock and Mr. Valenti asked Ms. Gartman to “mind his pole” while he went up to the nearby restrooms for a few moments. Ms. Gartman took the rod and sat, chatting with Mrs. Valenti. It was not more than a minute when she noticed the fishing rod bend and almost flew out of her hands. Mrs. Valenti excitedly coached Ms. Gartman until the strange looking fish lie on the dock flapping wildly.

Mr. Valenti upon his return from the restroom unhooked the prize and gave it to Ms. Gartman. It was a few hours and a couple of phone calls to her boyfriend before Ms. Gartman realized that the fish represented a strange and rare species. Finally, a call to world renowned ickytheologist Mr. K.W.Stanberry confirmed that the “catch” was indeed a previously unknown species. It has been tentatively named “Bottle-nosed Ballerina Fish”. It has been transported to the University of Miami department of oceanic research for further investigation.

We hope to have more information on this rare “find” shortly.