Coffee

I love to make the coffee in the morning.  To do it I must be up and out of bed before Elisabeth, which is usually not possible.  She likes to get up very early and lately I have stayed in bed later and later…

Making the coffee is a religious ritual of a sort.  Its origins go back a long ways.  Its whys and wherefores are clouded in history.  I can try to give you the precise order and progression of the making of the coffee but I can not be 100% sure that I am correct in the telling, but I will try.

Only turn on the lights you need in the kitchen.  One over the sink is plenty.  If you need more than that perhaps the one over the stove. (Not for working-God no!  There is plenty of light for working with just the one over the sink or the one over the stove, but for warmth and comfort of the soul.  I need that.)  I come in sometimes and the kitchen is gray and cold even with four pots bubbling on the stove and a chicken in the oven.  Elisabeth can work in the dark and it doesn’t seem to bother her a bit. I am the one who needs light.  I turn on the strong, overheads and the kitchen brightens like a movie set and Elisabeth will look at me with a look that says “what a waste!”  When I leave she might shut them off and just turn on the one over the sink. 

Next I take out the ingredients and the coffee pot and the filter.  For the past thirty-five years we have made coffee with a glass pot and a filter and a funnel.  We have had Mr. Coffee, percolators, presses, and those new, tiny single-serve containers that make individual cups but none of the alternatives has lasted.  The funnel and filter survives (I think) because of the ritual.  Oh, the coffee is better too, but it is the ritual that has made us funnel/filter people.  

These are the essential elements of the morning making of the coffee:

The glass coffee pot and plastic filter funnel

The coffee

The spoon(s)

The glass pot filled with the correct amount of water

The stove

The coffee comes in a can.  It is already ground and is of the very fine, dark, drip variety.  We have a coffee bean grinder and it sits on the counter.  We have not used it in a while but it is left there, on the counter, to remind us that we may use it again sometime.  It is loud and disturbing and never became fully part of the ritual.  We are not purists when it comes to grinding our own beans.  Out-of-the-can and already ground is fine.  Elisabeth buys coffee like there will come a day when no more will ever be available.  When it is on sale she will come home with five or ten cans or whatever the limit is that she can buy.  We will never run out of coffee for the ritual. 

There is a specific amount of water that is put into the glass kettle and set on the back-left burner.  The gas for the back-left burner is turned on.  The knob for the front-right burner is turned to the “light” position and the stove ticks loudly and ignites the back-left burner.  After it is lit, quickly shut the front-right knob.  The igniter on the back-left burner is defective and this method allows one to light the burner without the use of matches.  There is a box of wooden kitchen matches on the top of the microwave but we never use it for the coffee ritual.

When the back-left igniter went defective I began for a short time using the front-left burner to heat the water but Elisabeth explained to me that is the wrong burner (there is a practical reason for this, but it is lost to the ages and the back-left burner is fully accepted as the correct burner now.  See note below for possible explanation.)

While the pot of water heats, take the filter and put it in the funnel.  We have used the white, bleached filters.  In a pinch, many, many years ago we even went through a phase of using folded paper towels.  The ritual now is firmly entrenched and we use brown paper, unbleached filters that come in a green and red box.  Again purchased en mass and stored in the pantry in the garage, but the ones we need each day are loose in the bottom drawer of the kitchen cabinets where the Pyrex pie pans and casserole dishes are stored.

The finished carafe, funnel and filter are placed on the front-left hand burner-burner Off!

This is the point where the ritual turns contemplative.  There is time to think.  Time when the water is not boiled yet everything is prepared.  Incorporated into the ritual at this point the seemingly unrelated ritual of emptying the dishwasher may come into play.  If there are dishes that are clean they may be put into the cabinet. Quietly!  Very Quietly! 

Remember Elisabeth is still sleeping.  Banging dishes can wake her.  Clanging silverware may wake her.  (I don’t mind putting the dishes away, but I hate putting the silverware into the silverware drawer.  It is like an early morning test that a psychologist might have devised to see if one is capable/awake sufficiently to put the forks-into the fork place and the teaspoons- into the teaspoon place…etc.  It is a maddening test).  And finally the pot on the left-rear burner begins to whistle!

I have already measured out four, fully rounded tablespoons of coffee and put it into the filter.  That means I have a dirty tablespoon but no teaspoon with which to serve the sugar.  It used to be that the coffee was just dumped into the filter straight out of the can in a healthy dollop, but that part of the ritual has developed to a carefully measured four tablespoons.  But!  Where we once used a long handled ice-tea spoon for the sugar the tablespoon (which we just used for the coffee measure) has evolved into the ice-tea spoon’s place.  I don’t know…I find that uncomforting.  One can not use a tablespoon for sugar.  It must be unhealthy.  I grapple with the complexity as I grasp the kettle with the boiling water and begin the pouring.

(Note: one possible explanation as to why the left-rear burner must be used for the kettle.  If the front burner was used one would have to reach over the flame to pour the water over into the filter cone vessel sitting on the left-rear burner.  It is a longer reach not to mention the possibility of burns as ones arm lingers above an open flame/front burner.  As I said, the actual reason for this is lost so I only conjecture here.)

The pouring of the water.  I prefer to drizzle the water in a thin stream and just soak the coffee, not pour the water in and fill the cone up to the top with boiling water.  After the coffee is soaked I drip more and more on until all the water is used.  During this process I usually put my face over the cone once or twice and breathe deeply the aroma and steam of the brewing coffee water.  I swear I get high from the smell.  I also never let Elisabeth see me doing this.  I am not sure what she would think or do if she did. 

When all the water has dripped through I put the coffee pot with the filter, funnel and all onto the left-rear burner and turn the flame down to the lowest setting.  There is sits gently warming while I get my cup and sugar (using the long handled ice tea spoon) and dollop of whole milk ready.  I put that into the microwave for forty-four seconds so the milk is hot and then (and only then!) I pour in the coffee. 

I pretty much only use one of two cups (this is not strictly part of the ritual but I thought I would mention it here in case any of you ever sleeps over and inadvertently begins to use one of these cups-Don’t!).  One is the white mug with the blue letters underlined in red that says “Dad”, and the other is the Homer Simpson cup with the portrait of Homer and the words “Atomic Dad”!  These cups are the exact right size and weight and thickness for my coffee though I try to be flexible on this.  There are other cups that are very nice and if you visit you are free to use any of them.  One is a very thick mug with the saying on it- “Coffee should be black as night, hot as hell and strong as Love!”  and I find it very attractive but it is just too heavy for my coffee.  Besides, it would be incongruous for me to drink my coffee with milk in a mug that comes right out and says coffee should be black!  Am I wrong?